Amsterdam – Bad Decisions

FrontBefore we sat in the air-conditioned room, on the green couch in the Amsterdam coffee shop, our friendly (and obviously amused) ‘Salesman’ handed us some cards.

The size and shape of a credit card, full of information about understanding and handling our new purchase (and a number to call if that is not the case!).

A very cool campaign, aimed primarily at tourists, promoting safe consumption. Thank goodness we didn’t venture to try any fungi, I refuse to imagine how that might have ended up – not good!

Prior to carrying through with our bad decision, I gave my husband a few warnings. I knew already that the substance which we were about to ‘enjoy’ (I do say that sarcastically!) was/is much stronger here than anywhere else in the world, which means it doesn’t really make a difference whether or not you have previously ‘tried the item’.

Unless you live in Holland and are a regular smoker, you are likely going to have an experience that will knock you over.

Understanding this, we decided we were going to use the tiniest amount possible, put the left over nine tenths back in the handy carrying case it came in, and head out into the dusk to enjoy our night. But that wasn’t really how it was going to happen.
The backside

Surprisingly, (to us at the time!) the ‘use as little as possible’ theory didn’t really pan out! With only two puffs inhaled and a mere moment spent in the cafe, we were doomed already – and we knew it.

We needed to get out to the street before we embarrassed ourselves any further. I figured we could just walk around until the effects wore off – I under estimated ‘the effects’!

We managed to slog no more than a block holding each other up – certainly making a scene while ‘whispering’ (were we really whispering?) details of our personal horror to each other;

I feel sick/I could crap my pants/where are we?/I need to sit/what’s going on?/I hate this/I need to lie down/my legs don’t work/this is the worst moment of my life/am I dying?/I can’t hold my head up/what is happening right now?/I feel gross/my brain doesn’t work anymore/I have to pee/I am blacking out/I hate Amsterdam/my legs won’t hold me up/we are going to die/I can’t see!/where are we?/this is awful!/why did we do this to ourselves?/why did we come here?!!

I realized we would need to sit, for a long, long while – immediately! Thankfully we had made it to the nearest park bench.

At least we could rely on my autopilot – neither of us had been consciously heading in any particular direction. Lying down, as we both wished to do, was out of the question as we did not have accommodation – and we couldn’t have made it to the car at that moment if our lives had depended upon it…

Oh Amsterdam!

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You can follow this trip by heading to the ‘8 Country EU Tour‘ section, or you can enjoy many more photos of Amsterdam by heading to the Habitual Runaway on Facebook.

(continued)

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8 responses to “Amsterdam – Bad Decisions

  1. I’m happy to report that both my encounters with a coffee shop went decidedly much better than yours!
    I’m glad I got to experience it again one more time before the laws go through in the new year.
    The place I went to this time around was about a thirty minute walk from Dam Square.
    Surprisingly enough, I was able to find the place by using a map!
    It was a small place, street level. Door was open, it was hazy inside.
    I was so hot from walking….I just wanted to chill and have some water.
    I had to go to the counter to look at the menu. There were a fair
    amount of varieties….also explaining it’s effects and whatnot.
    I knew of one kind that I did want to try, so I got that one. I also decided to get three other kinds.
    Which is a lot to some, I know. hehe
    This entire time, my mom is sitting at a bar table, waiting on me.
    I sat down with my purchase and was excited and anxious all at the same time.
    I was comtemplating on whether or not to use the Volcano….but instead just went with papers
    The only size they had were ‘king size,’ which are longer than a king size cigarette! One of the guys there actually cut the whole end of the pack off for me! lol
    I seemed somewhat jittery when I was trying to roll….but I ended up with something half decent.
    I took two or three puffs and I was good. It had hit me that fast too. My mind was going a mile a minute. My mom asked me how it was…..I was like, this is awesome. Sooo much stronger than the stuff at home!
    During this time, the little shop had filled up. There was a line of people going right out the door. I had come at just the right time!
    I finished my water, packed up my wares and scooted out of the shop,
    Well, to say the least, I was higher than a kite at this point. Still functionable for the most part, but I just wanted to sit back and hang out. But there was none of that until the walk back to the hotel.
    Which seemed to go on forever and ever. It was at least an hour’s walk. Which I’m not used to. :P~
    But I was in truckin’ mode….so I just kept walking. It was warm that day, so I was sweating like crazy. Ick. Soo many people….having to keep my head up so I could see where I was going.
    Needless to say, I’m glad that I went to that lil coffee shop!

    Like

    • Thanks so much for sharing! I love a different perspective – especially a well written one ;). If I am ever in the same situation again, I know who I am going to request as a travel companion!! xo

      Like

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